天下制覇

What? There’s nothing wrong with Xanth.

Impressions:

Yeah, I give up trying to understand where this is going anymore. We get our first clues as to the real big baddie in the last minute of the episode, and theoretically 20 minutes from the end of the series. I still refuse to believe this show is actually over until they’ve blown up the Ark and everybody is living happily ever after. I don’t care that the preview called next week the last episode. I just refuse to believe it and nothing short of Japan sinking beneath the ocean will convince me otherwise. And even I know how tricksy the Japanese can be with their submerging mecha, so that will just bring this to a relatively decent probability that the show is over.

The episode was actually fairly entertaining for being a school fair episode. It was distinctly not Prism Ark, but taken on its own, it was pretty funny. The Cinderella touch with the breast plate instead of a glass slipper was pretty quality, and the little squabbling love birds finally got to confess and play some tonsil hockey. Litte’s betrayal also happened, which I was honestly expecting to be cut entirely. Still, we haven’t quite reached episode 1 (though they could get there in a single episode if they try), so I really have to wonder how things are going to end next week.

Speaking of which, I’ll be on a plane this time next week travelling from one coast to another. Expect the writeup to be delayed at best.

Kisarov announces the start of the school festival and the competition for the Prism Night Prince and Princess. Litte continues, showing off the breast armor that the prince and princess have to fetch and telling them that they need to put ’em on and then set themselves in the giant Prism Heart (nyuk nyuk) in whatever configuration it’s in. Whichever two make it to the Heart in the armor will be the prince and princess. The students (especially Acty), are unruly and know all the rules. They just want the damn thing to start. Me too.

Kisarov takes over again and let’s things get underway. All the students yell his normal sentence finisher to try to speed things up.

Bridget and Kagura declare their own intentions to win and Kagura suits up for battle.

The clock strikes twelve, and cuckoo Kisarov officially starts the competition. Bridget is entranced by the fireworks and gets trampled. Prieica and Hyaweh get ready to do their best too, but she’s weighed down by the fanclub members attatched to her leg and begging her to not compete. The third member runs ahead, leaving Pirecia to stomp on the other two before giving chase.

Acty rushes through the men with Ein and Jungy in pursuit, all ready to put their plan into motion. They get stomped first by Orthy then by Priecia, who gives them an eyeful of her white panties on the way out and up. Priecia catches up the girl and says that she’s got to catch up to Hyaweh… no… win the PPP… but the girl runs headlong into a pillar, rendering it all moot.

Priecia lands in a melee of people, and ends up Mirage Rushing them all and sending the armor flying. As the mess clears, Priecia calls out for Hyaweh, who is on his back on top of an injured student. Priecia levels her sword at him and announces that the challenge will go on. Orthy lands on him with her ass in his face… and Hyaweh notes that Orthy’s are white as well. Priecia yells at him again and he runs off. She looks down and sees that Kisarov somehow ended up in the fracas as well. He also notes that Priecia’s panties are white. She stomps him and wanders off.

From behind the trees, a masked Fel pulls out the female breast’s armor… or is it. Karin announces that she won’t allow someone unworthy to have it. Fel tries to talk her way out of it, but Karin is determined to bring divine wrath upon Fel. Luckily, Litte knocks out Karin… but then attacks Fel too and takes the breast armor for herself. Karin and Fel both tell her that she’s the wrong size for the armor, but Litte summons a giant stone hand and crushes them.

Ein has the male armor at this point, but Acty and Jung are in pursuit. Acty manages to tackle Ein, sending the armor onto Jung, who is attacked by every other male. Hyaweh watches from above. Filia appears behind him and hits on her brother, telling him that she’ll be the one to have his first kiss.

She puckers up. The male armor falls into Hyaweh’s lap, so Filia excuses herself to go fetch the women’s armor. An arm grabs Hyaweh’s leg… all the guys are hanging on and attempting to climb over eachother to get at it. Hyaweh screams in horror.

Litte thinks how to get through this while constantly fixing the breast armor as it falls off her. The fan club also lurks nearby and waits for their chance. They get distracted by Acty running past, and Litte decides to make her move. She trips and the armor flies off her into Kagura’s arms. Bridget snared her to assist Kagura. Unfortunately for Kagura, there’s a special lunch laid out in front of her. Her stomach overtakes her and she sits down to eat. The lunch poofs, and Fel appears in its place, snatching the armor. It doesn’t last long as Priecia flies in with a Prism Kick and smashes Fel.

Hyaweh comes running up with the armor and the two match the pose on the heart display. The swarm of students come running up, knocking them over and dropping the heart on top of them. As they lift the heart, Kisarov announces the winners… Prince Hyaweh, and Princess Filia, embedded in the heart. Filia announces that it’s now been officially decided that Hyaweh’s first kiss will be her’s. Priecia walks off, dejected.

That night, amidst fireworks, the festival starts. In the girls’ dressing room, Kagura learns that her chest is entirely too large for the costume.

Priecia practices her role as the wicked witch. She angrily throws the prop apple at Fel, who is also down. At least they’re not the horse or magical mirror. Filia walks out in full princess garb. Priecia is gracious at least. Filia wonders aloud if Priecia is lying to herself and says that she’ll make things okay.

The play starts. Hyaweh is stunned that the princess is Priecia. Filia is right there to feed her the lines.

Backstage, Filia lets both know that it’ll be fine, even if they have to make stuff up as they go. The play continues, complete with Kagura’s awful acting against masked avenger Priecia. Hyaweh runs on stage to ‘avenge’ her killing his guards, trips over Bridget, and pulls off Priecia’s breast plate, displaying her wares to the world.

He tries to apologize, but gets Glow Rushed away and the stage is destroyed. He gets up and hugs the breast plate, vowing to find the chest that fits it. I may be taking liberties with the translation here, I may not. As the curtains go down, Kisarov announces that this is epic theater. Karin notices that Litte is missing.

The play continues through various settings until we come to the sleeping Snow White. Kisarov is in tears. Priecia sleeps as Prince Hyaweh searches for the breast plate’s owner. He gets swarmed by the idiot trio in vine costumes. He finally comes upon the beautiful sleeping Priecia and finds that the plate fits her perfectly. A voice tells him that only a kiss can wake her. Hyaweh leans in close as the crowd chants for a kiss.

He lays one on her… forehead.

Everybody is disappointed, not the least of which is Priecia, who pushes Hyaweh down and pulls out her sword. He tries to play along, saying he needed to wake her. Priecia asks him if he really loved her or not. Fel pops up and says that this isn’t in the script. Hyaweh also slips out of his role (back to boku instead of watashi), and admits that he loves her too. She says that she loves her too, and Fel calls for a kiss of true love.

Hyaweh gets up, and the two kiss. The crowd cheers. Kisarov announces that the duel was magnificent. The curtains close. Priecia apologizes and asks for Hyaweh to forgive her. Hyaweh says that there’s nothing to apologize for. Even Filia is happy about how everything has worked out.

The curtains open for the cast to take a bow.

Bridget stalks through the halls, thinking that this is her chance to go after Hyaweh’s crap for Sablum. She opens the door to his room and finds Litte talking to a Prism. She says that there’s no mistaking that Hyaweh’s the one. Bridget overhears the word "Phagiel" and an image of an Angel echoes in her mind. Litte bows to the Prism and thanks Judas. Bridget recognizes the name and is horrified.

As the crowd cheers, Priecia whispers in Hyaweh’s ear that she wants him to come with her after this. (I’m not sure of this line, it was quiet and tough to hear, sorry). He looks into her pleading eyes as the curtains close.